Suddenly I really want to skip my meeting tonight. I really don't want to go. I want to test drive cars instead. The sun is shining for the first time in about a week.
I know that when I don't want to go is when I need to go most. I rarely ever skip meetings. People would notice and question me. I don't think I'm hiding or anything. Of course I never seem to realize stuff like that until later. Sigh. I should call someone. They'll just tell me to go. Usually the only time I miss is when I'm sick. I'm not sick. I want to play hooky.
Update: I went to the meeting. I didn't call anyone until I'd already decided to go. I couldn't think of anyone with strong recovery who would tell me to skip. I've very glad I did. There were two newcomers and we were locked out of our regular room. Our literature was locked in too, so we ended using the bag from another meeting I had in my trunk.
I remember being in the same place. You're right on track. You even realize that no one with good sobriety is going to tell you what you want to hear. Just keeping do the same thing until you find you actually WANT to go to meetings.
Posted by: Namenlosen Trinker | August 25, 2007 at 04:12 PM