It is time for me to start eating like a grown up. This includes cooking, not reheating frozen servings of my favorite carbs, but actual combining of ingredients into more than the some of their parts. I want food synergy. Of course, to cook I need clean vessels and counter space. Which are both in short supply in my home. Also, a clear kitchen table and at least one chair would be nice.
I realized yesterday that I had moved all my kitchen chairs into my dining room months ago in a frenzy of activity that left me a pile of stuff to remove from my home and a sad absence of usable space when I pooped out before finishing my task. So my urge to throw together a soup from the contents of my cupboard went nowhere when I cataloged all the tasks required before I opened the first tin. I want a clean cozy kitchen. I just don’t want to expend effort to get it. Sigh. I guess my desire to cook like a grownup must be proceeded by the discipline to maintain my possessions like an adult.
I’m also insecure about cooking. I love to read cookbooks but I usually don’t see the general knowledge that I am looking for. I love my America’s Test Kitchen Family Cookbook, but with all their cool tricks and interesting facts I could not find any information about cooking rice to freeze for later. Maybe there is no trick to it, but I think rice would get mushy if cooked as usually and then frozen in smaller portions for later. I love brown rice, but don’t see me waiting for it to cook after getting home from work late. I love my frozen Trader Joe’s rice, but I eat the whole 2 cups as a main course rather than eat a serving and waste the rest.
There is also no information on cooking a turkey breast in any of my cookbooks. I don’t need to know how to clean, prep and cook a whole bird. I want to know how to get fresh cooked, moist, white meat turkey with zero gizzard contact and minimal carcass. When I ask my sister how to do it she shrugs and says, “You just put it in the oven.” She also just makes up recipes as she goes along. Almost my entire food prep experience is of the mix, heat and serve variety. I think I could count on my fingers the times I made meals from scratch that didn’t include a can of soup or dried mix. I guess I’ve cooked a lot on a grill, but mostly just meat and veggies. I’m too insecure to grill for other people. There are too many over- or under-cooked meals to subject anyone else to my grilling.
I know I have to learn by doing. I’ve seen people work their way through cookbooks online and find it fascinating. I want to learn how to really cook, but I also know that I am undisciplined and need to focus on eating balanced low-fat meals. Plus no sugar, but not sugar substitutes or look-alike foods.
Did I also mention I really want to draw, again? Yep, so far all I’ve done is shop for more supplies. What I really need is the perfect (pen, paintbrush, pencil, pastel, notebook, canvas, paper, journal, or inspirational guide) to make it all come together. It doesn’t matter that in my head my drawings look like nothing I’ve ever done. It doesn’t matter that I’ve got an abundance of supplies already.
Bah. I’m just depressing myself. I don’t want this to turn into yet another post I’ve written and then erased or let languish on a hard-drive. Forgive my pretentious turns of phrase. I got a compliment on my writing today and it went right to my self-conscience head. So, I haven't edited this, please forgive.